santasusanna10. <3

Isnt it funny how no matter how much someone hurts you, you always end up going back to them.

Isnt it funny how when someone tells you forever they never mean it.

Isnt it funny how when someones 197 miles away you'd walk all the way just to see them.

Isnt it funny how 3 words can change everything.

I'm sick of pretending your just from my past
I'm sick of pretending i don't miss you.
I'm sick of pretending i don't want you.
I'm sick of pretending your mine.

i miss you, i miss you, i miss you, i fucking miss you!

you were just one of them good looking lads i met on hoilday.
quiet a arse aswell.
proper loved yourself, thought you would get all the girls you wanted.
big headed really..

ping pong we were all playing, i didnt know you, i was out to impress, fell in love with your accent, welsh of course, had a few games, looked like a tit :') asked if you wanted to come beach with us all at night, you said "why not? will be a laugh" and smiled.
We all had a mess about in the sea, was fun, some idiot thought it would be fun to try and make a fire, we failed. as i was bored, i began making a hole in all the sand and stuck my feet in, you was messing about annoying me, i thought nothing of it, was wierd.
6th floor was the first time we touched, just the two of us, about half 2 in the morning, i asked for a hug, you said, " i'll see you in the morning you gimp" i said "i don't care, give me a hug." We hugged. i thought nothing of it at all.


the last day.

broke my heart it did.
i thought you were a twat the whole of the holiday but no, your were amazing.
you told my cousin you liked me, i couldnt belive it, i loved someone and never saw it coming.
why did you have to tell me you liked me, on the last day?!
i never saw it coming.

saying goodbye felt like someone was ripping my heart out and leaving it in spain.
knowing i was never going to see you again.
knowing this was goodbye and nothing was going to happen like it again.

what i'd do for us to be together is unbelievable, we argue all the time but i still love you your perfect.

from the 27th of july till now, i still love you as much as i did then.

i hate love.

so we aint gone camping yet -.- because it rained but hopefully tonight we are :D
will put pictures on when i recover if we go :)

took this the other night..

Finally have a life, for the weekend.

so yeah,  i have a fun weekend ahead.

Finally.

Gonna be good :D

so i met this lad through my bestfriend's friend & he's 16 in college, in a band, plays guitar, absolutely stunning, Can't get any better :D

he's got a gig on Friday so I'm going to that & thennnnn afterward every ones going camping :D

and the best bit about it me & Jorja have planned it so there wont be any twat's there..

going theres..

 me, 

Jorja,

Matthew ( Jorja's boyfriend ) 

Callum ( The lad im on about :D )

Adam

John( HE'S GINGER! )

Polly ( SHE'S GINGER! )

loads of pollys friends..

and a few others of us, i think its gonna be good :D

i quiet possibly could be very drunk. And make another mistake with callum :')

so yeah :D i went shopping in the week and got an aoutfit for a tener! its dead nice aswell & from h&m..

oh and a bra for a tenner, now thats fit.

this but in a like peach colour £4.99

This but in black £3.99!

i was pretty chuffed with it :D

so im kinda obsessed with my new eyeliner..

its about 8 quid but works wonders, im like attached to it.
it stays on forever, from crying wind, anything.

so yeah my mothers engaged and i dont know if im happy about it or not.. He seems to alwaqys want to be that bit better at making my mum happier than me :/ But yeah there getting married abroad and then having some massive party over here, oh the joys.

something will go wrong coz he got a bitch of an ex wife :')

gotta go -.- in school.

a girl being something shes not.xo

hg rbjvivbnv 
its been like forever.
im sorry </3

i actually missed you, but i've just not been able to get online!
i spent weeks in hospital then was always tired and now Im back at school i have time for nothing!
i hate it.

god you've all missed so much, i'v made mistakes, got drunk, had a laugh, fell out, made friends, been bitchy, the usual really :')

so lets startttttttt with hospital.
it all happened again -.-
spent like a life time in there, it was like pas boredom.
they still don't know whats wrong with me yet, its so annoying.

so yeah, i slept with matty :/
biggest mistake everrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
fcb fgghuigvn g FACT!  wasn't even worth it.
my mum found out, his mum found out was so funny :') funny this is, my mum don't give a shit.
its not she don't care about me, she just knew it was gonna happen and there was nothing she could do :')
so now me and him aint walking, he hasn't told his girlfriend, so me & Jorja are trying to find her & were gonna tell her :D gonna be fun, God he's such a twat.
NEVER! play strip 21.

so then, loads of shit went round school about me when i was in hospital -.- people fell out with me, just because some slag was chatting shit, not even gonna go into detail. But tis all sorted now :D

So, my friend Beth, who is Mattys sister, came out bisexual and she likes me.
We don't talk anymore coz i shagged her brother :') what a twat.
not bothered, she gets terrorised at school.

omgomgomgomg!
IM GOING NEVERSHOUTNEVER! & THE MAINE IN 17DAYS!
so excited, got so many gigs coming up recently :D cost me hundreds -.-


thought about going lez. then thought again, i duno, i think im gonna stay away from boys at the minute, even though im meeting Jorja's boyfriends friend tomorrow :')
meh i duno, gonna have to be special to change my mind anyway, started thinking more wisely now anyway..

so yeah, i met A Day To Remember :D
very happy moment btw :')

meh i gotta gooo.
im my diploma -.- happy times, lol jks.
promise i wont forget to blog now, i missed it.

a girl being something she's not.xo

A little bit of an update :D

omgomgomgomg!
I ORDERED MY NEVERSHOUTNEVER! TICKET :D happy happy fucking happy.
March 23 2011 7:00 PM, Academy 2 Manchester.
Shall be the happiest moment ever.


God im so excited.


Bestfriend? Lol wtf.
I am no longer friends with Jorja, Don't ask why, Just no. People change.


Matty? bvgobfjfjg. (ANGER).
i dont fucking get it!
he has been at my house 4 nights in a row now, not leaving to late, we sit having a laugh watching tv with my pracically lay on him, we talk about the weirdest things, we made fucking cakes for god sake!
But he's still with his girlfriend, Its starting to hurt again.
my mum likes him, my little brother loves him to bits, he's perfect. and i can't have him.
my mum says he like me, but i don't know :/ its doing my head in.


I'm still off school :') been about 4 week now or something.. but yeah, who's complaining? not me, Just the government. Fuck them.
Gonna have so much coursework to catch up on though -.- Fml.


My mums been going out like constantly recently -.- so im stuck babysitting, But, i've got about 30 quid out of it :D 
and mattys been coming over so thats been putting me in good moods :)




Going shopping tommorrow with my mummy, Gonna  try convince her to let me have another piercing.. she said not till inn 16 because thats when i can have sex so i can do what i want them :')
but thats a whole 10 months away -.- so gonna be like "muuuuummmmy know like you love me" see where it gets me. 
Wish me luck, Seriously.




My dads starting to take the mic :/ he keeps letting us down.. making plans then saying he's busy.
meh.

OH! i got a new dress..

Valentines days overrated.

jbvubwjv I FUCKING HATE IT!

Especially when im single.
it doesn't half depress me.


it all started back in year 4..
I was yano, the normal girl, Happy and stuff.
there was a new boy, he was horrible.. I thought nothing of him, Until.
valentines day. Know the trays you had with all your stuff in in primary school? well yeah, it was break time and we went out for "play time".. when I got back, I opened my tray to get something out & there was a card.. I opening it, it was one of them really cheap ones, off this new boy.
inside it said " to katiey luve alex.. "it took my ages to read and I just didn't know what to do, by the end everyone in school found out and at dinner time I was pressured into getting with him -.-
we lasted about 6month, first kiss and everything it was horrible, but I'll never forget it.
bless my first valentines :')

so that why I don't like valentines day, I've not yet spent any of my whole 15 years of live with someone.
its very depressing actually.
im going to spend the day in bed, watching depressing films with chocolate and ice cream.

I started liking Matty again :/
even though  do care about Nathan, me and matt have been spending a lot of time together and i just kinda keep getting all these feeling for him back :/
I'm even having dreams about him, one where we had sex :| wtf.
and then another about us kissing, it was so wierd I woke up in a shit mood because i knew that it wasn't real & I'd do anything for it to be.
he's still with his girlfriend, he keeps like telling me shes annoying and his sister is telling me they arguing all the time :/
I really don't know what to do, I keep getting mixed signals off him..
like Saturday he blew his girlfriend and mates of and came mine, he stayed till 12 and we made cakes :') and we were lay on my bed looking into each others eyes :@ meh i hate it.

I reallllllllllly don't know what to do.

but yeah, FUCK VALENTINES DAY! :D

So i was going through my laptop, and found some stuff..

So it was Christmas night, feeling crap, what more can I need when I
have beer and my bestfriend.

Summer romance ;)

 

As you do, Chillin in Triangle toilets, My bestfriends the
classiest thing going I tell you that.

Chillin at Ivyrise gig, My bestfriend has never ending legs -.-

Yeah bitch, JohnnyGetTheGun are some amazing band.

OMGOMGOMG!
As if i had my picture took with JohnnyGetTheGun!
Look dreadful but god i was chuffed.

Betttttttth & Me.
So many memories.

So yeah, My first gig.
Kids in glass houses.
i was so scared i didn't even go in the mosh pits :') just chilled at the side.

So yeah, i dont know if you know but i have so mega obsession with Pixie Lott.
Im gonna marry her one day.
so my mums ex boyfriend got me two tickets :D
i was over the moon.

So yeah, me and him might not be together anymore..
But i miss him so much & love him with all my heart.

SANTASUSANNA 2010.
Best by far.
met so many amazing people on this holiday.

SANTASUSANNA10.
showin some of my moves on the dance floor.