THIS YEARS GONE SO FAST.

the years nearly over!
i cant wait... This year has been most peobelbly the worse year ever.

To much shit has happened.

I lost some people, I gained some people, I had my heart broken, I had my heart fixed.
I was lied to, I got revenge, I caught people bitching about me, I got revenge,  I got cheated on, oh I got revenge.
I smiled, I cried, I got pissed, I got laid, I made mistakes.
but know what, fuck it..

This year;
its been a bit of a mad one.
I never expected it to fly so fast though, I remember last NYE, oh god :|
I was drunk at home ( we had a party D: )
and at 12 o clock I couldn't get hold of my dad and it really upset me, I tried ringing for about 4 hours but it just would get through, then I realised at half 5 in the morning after crying, running my makeup & arguing with my mum, his number wasn't right :')!
Bad times.
but yeah, 2010, Fuck.
Never gonna forget it, but a lot of it, I wish I could..
I changed a lot this year..
This is gonna be very embarrassing, but yeah I've changed so its good..

This was me in January, fuck i was such a dirty chav, what was i thinking :|?
Really? Thats shocking.
Fanny fringe, slaggy pose, and wth .. just me.
wth was I :')

This is me now :))

im not pretty I get that, but I think i look a lot better than I was, i dress better, as in cover myself up, my hairs darker, and I don't wear as much makeup :)

I have changed a hell of a lot..

I listen to different music, I youst to love n-dubz, chipmunk, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber :|..

wth was I really?

but nowwwwwwww..

i listen to stuff like, kids in glass houses, boys like girls, a rocket to the moon, you me at six, a day to remember

Stuff like that :)

that's a lot better.

Every weekend way back in the start of the year I'd go out on a Friday night, sit on a park with about 20 people and get drunk, make many mistakes and piss in bushes. :|

drinking outside? Don't do it.

I once rang up my boyfriend at the time and told him I hated him, he ruined my life, I never wanted to see him again and I was madly in love with my bestfriend, yeah, bad times.

I'd go out in joggers a tiny vest top, push up bra Ugg boots & rob one of the lads jackets who I was out with, I wore stupid colours like pink on my eyes and bright pink cheeks with massive gold earrings.

< THIS IS HOW I WOULD DRESS FOR SCHOOL! :| Fml.

So yeah, I changed this year, for the better.

I've got fuck all else to say, I was just thinking about shit changing..

so yeah :D Everyone have a good new year :)

a girl being something shes not.xo

Christmas?

Christmas.


meh. this year I'm really not excited for Christmas, I don't know why I really don't but its doing my head in!
WHY CAN'T I GET EXCITED?!


I'll tell you something, I a good think about your parents being separated is that you get even more presents :))
that sounds really evil but yano.


loads of people see Christmas in different ways..
I see it as a time where I eat to much food, end up having no room in my bedroom & dressing up nice for once.
Some people see it as a day where you can lie in bed all day and do nothing.
Some people see it as a really religious time where they help homeless and stuff meh I duno.


Christmas at my house?
its different every year here really.
I believed in father Christmas till last year -.-  I'm 15.
but yeah, id go up to bed at 9 o clock just because its Christmas eve.. I wouldn't be aloud back down because father Christmas wont come otherwise, I can never get asleep though.
when i finally fall asleep, I wake up about 7 ish and me and my little brother get in bed with my mummy for a bit because its so cold..
then we all go down the stairs together, my mum first and she goes :O father Christmas has been and my little brothers face lights up and he goes running into the living room and we open al our presents at about 9 ish my dad ring me to see how i am and if i got what i wanted, these are the times i miss the most.
not having my dad with me on Christmas morning.
i miss being a little kid.
when i get ready and get all girly with my hair done nice, and wear a dress.
i go see my daddy :))))))
i love seeing my dad, its the only time of the year I see him smiling I love it.
my dad means the world to me even though he can annoy me sometimes.


yeah then we open all our presents at my nan's and my auntie and uncles come round and stuff..
its fun.


We then go to my grans and have Christmas dinner, she makes THE best Christmas dinner ever.
we have our presents family comes over.
I go home get in bed and feel all meh, fat and tired.
I really do wish i was a little kid again, i was so happy.
everything was so perfect..


Thats my Christmas, oh the joys, I cant wait i tell ya.
no seriously, no sarcasm there :') Lol. jks.
its all sarcasm :')


meh effort typing.
I'm off, but yeah, Merry Christmas everyone :) 


a girl being something shes not.xo

This is as festive as i get. 
Yes, Red Lipstick.

Worst week of my life.

I know I moan but fml.

Hospital.
it all started last Friday morning, I woke up ready to get ready for school and had the worse pain ever on the right side of belly so my mum let me have the day of & got me an appointment at the doctors for 3 as the morning went on it go to about 11 and I was in so much pain, so she took me to the drop in centre.. they told me I had to go to hospital so we had to drive for 35 minutes to a hospital.. I got there about 12.30 and they then thought it was my appendices but nothing to bad.. they said they would keep me in over night.. oh yay.
I got worse over the night and they couldn't find out what it was then on Monday, they decided they were going to operate. Yes I got very scared.. I didn't eat for 36hours! I turned into to nothing!
lay there in operation place I was really scared.. the doctor man put a mask over my mouth.. I screamed I'm not stupid you know and got really upset, crying for my dad, I wasn't getting him :/
then I remember waking up in so much pain the next day with a doctor over me.. so now your like what was it?
the doctor said that I had a cist on one of my ovaries and it had exploded.. but they still took my appendices out!
they let me home 2days later though :) I still can't walk now.. il be able to around Christmas :/ oh the joys.

My Birthday.
it wasn't that bad because I was out of hospital but I still couldn't walk, which really did my head in.. there's nothing much to say about my birthday because it was so boring.. I had no fun what so ever. so that's all I'm saying.

Friday.
depressing. I felt like complete shite all Friday.. I was supposed to be going out for my birthday.. that didn't happen because I couldn't walk :/ I was starting to get annoyed as well because I couldn't do anything :/ which upset me a awful lot.
I then had an argument with my bestfriend because she always chooses her boyfriend over me,
yes I felt like dying.

Saturday.
oh yay.
had to go stay with the father much to my delight.
but hey, i got to go round morrisons in a wheelchair :')
fun times, fun times.

meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh.
yeah it was shit, it was a horrible week but ah well :)
lifes a bitch, then you die :)